Top Ten Reasons I’m Not at Work.

10. My pet piranha ate my cocaine and he’s freaking out.

9. I’m down at the river sauteing some clams.

8. Scotch for Breakfast.

7. It’s Spring Break, I know that’s not really a thing for grownups but I hate change.

6. My cat seems depressed.

5. Why isn’t work at me? Think about that for a minute. Mind blown.

4. I’m pretty sure Gilligan is going to get off that island today, and I am not missing that.

3. Someone stole my lunch out of the fridge last week, and I’m waiting for them to be dragged before me.

2. I’m holding out for a management position.

  1. I consider myself freelance. scotch

 

 

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