FIRE DAY!

So, I live in Southern California and, as many of you know, we are literally on fire right now. And no we did not all go to hell…yet. Or maybe hell came to us? Hard to say. Anyway this has created a new and unusual phenomena we’re calling “fire days”. It’s like how Milk’s kids occasionally get to take snow days in the winter. Except it’s a lot warmer and you can’t breathe.

It’s seems kind of twisted I know, but after they got out of school early on Tuesday, and then got to stay home Wednesday and Thursday, they suddenly developed a keen interest in checking the TV news to see if it was another free day for them. This is terribly exciting when you’re under ten. It’s less exciting when you’re running around collecting important documents and critical stuffed animals in an old suitcase in case you have to flee. Do I leave the pet fish?

People from cold places used to tell me stories about huddling around the TV or radio and waiting for the announcement that their school was closed, which led to cheers from the kids and groans from parents.

This is pretty much the same situation except significantly more tragic.

 

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Milk Painted This!

Sometimes it’s disturbing how terrible kids can be. I think Milk once told me our jobs as parents is “to take tiny sociopaths and turn them into functional human beings.” An 8 year old doesn’t really process that the reason he is out of school is because it’s unsafe to breathe the air made out of tiny particles of trees and other peoples’ homes…and also probably some deer. He’s just excited because, in addition to no school, he can’t go outside so video games are the new math!

I’m less excited because I’ve been trapped indoors with three squirrels who have no way to vent energy besides screwing with each other and breaking things. Also, I already smoked for years. I don’t need to also breathe all this burnt insulation and pool furniture.

Anyway timely rant over. I’m going to make my kids go shopping for toys for kids who just lost everything. If you want to help here’s a link to the Red Cross.

2 thoughts on “FIRE DAY!

  1. Your fires are on the news round the world and have even reached our distant corner of the globe. Our thoughts are with you, there is not much else we can do from here. We did see there are many fire engines parked together, or toing and froing, what a horrible time for you all.

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