Pop quiz, hot-shot. You’re going to something called a “Beer Festival” at a place commonly known as a “Park”.

Do you wear:
A. Cargo shorts and the t-shirt from last year’s beer festival?

B. A flirty sundress and some cute flats?

C. A silk micro-mini with 12″ platform CFM shoes?

If you answered:

A: Congratulations, you’re a dude. I’m sure you’ll be very comfortable. It must be handy to have all those pockets.

B: Check you out, mama, making sensible decisions look good.

C: Seriously!? WTF, lady? Did you not know where your boyfriend was taking you today? Was this a surprise date? If so, that guy’s an asshole and you should totally punch him right in the throat.

I don’t think this was a surprise. You don’t look pissed off enough. Just really, really uncomfortable. When your boyfriend was putting on his cargo shorts and the t-shirt from last…